Having Mercury in your 9th, (is it also in Pisces?) may indeed be indicating a gender fluidity nature., because of the very nature of Mercury itself. And of course, a ruler in a mutable sign.
(MD: It is in my 9th house in Pisces, I mentioned that in my earlier posts, and my mother was a smoker, she developed COPD in her 40s and died at age 69, and Mercury can depict her worked in law enforcement as a phone dispatcher).
As for the 11th house, the house of hopes/dreams and friendships, - do you have Mars here or a reason to believe thy argued and fought here enough so to bring the couple to divorce? ....
(MD: Mars is in the 3rd house opposite the 9th conjunct Jupiter, Saturn and Lilith).
Since they didn't divorce until years later they tried then to make it work, (do you have a relationship in aspect from Sun (father ) to Moon (mother?)
(MD: Natal sun and moon conjunction in 8th house in Aquarius also conjunct SN).
When we see a square or opposition that suggests the parents weren't getting along prior to the birth of their child. The 12th house is just before the birth, so the last weeks.
(MD: I believe this, to become parents while their marriage was about to destabilize, and they will have another baby boy - my brother in 14 months).
To find the divorce (when you were 7 , ) I'd suggest looking at the 4th house as the IC is approx. 4-5 yrs old and into the 4th approx. 7 yrs of age.
(MD: I have a Pluto in the 4th house in Libra, also my Mom had an illness and she went to the hospital twice in the 1990s when I was ages 12 and again 17).
There is a wheel for the Tad Mann theory that goes along with the theory of a life span.
(MD: I lost a parent on Easter Sunday 2021, my mother...my 8th house has a sun and moon in the house of death...I'm in my early 40s in this life phase cycle).
Scroll down here on this link and you'll see the approximate ages (putting 7 yrs old into the 5th house)
(MD: It is said the the 5th represents a person's first pregnancy or experience of becoming a parent. Note there's Uranus in my 5th house in Scorpio and it's my ruling planet as an Aquarius. I never had any biological kids, I'm 41 now and had been in a few not-so-good romantic relationships in my adult life).
https://www.holestoheavens.com/exploring-life-time-astrology-with-at-mann/